My husband got drunkat a barbecue and said he'd leave me… if I paid him

DEAR DEIDRE:  DURING a row my husband said he would leave me if I paid him. It was so bizarre I think he was high on something – not for the first time.

We’d had an evening enjoying a barbecue. We are both 32. Our neighbours had come round and it was great to see them and chat, though we were good about social distancing.


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I went to bed around 10pm because I had to be up early for my job. I came down to get a drink after an hour and they were all sitting together, arms touching, sharing a bottle of rum.

There was mess all over the kitchen, broken glass on the floor and I cut my foot. I shouted at my husband and he stormed out.

I wrote a note saying enough was enough and he should go. He read the letter on his return and said he’d be happy to leave – as long as I paid him to go.

He apologised the next day but I think he had more than alcohol that night and I don’t think I can forgive him.

DEIDRE SAYS: Him not sticking to the social-distancing rules under-standably made you angry but do you have serious worries that he is using drugs regularly?

You have to ask him so you can unpick the issues and try to sort them.

Find support through wearewithyou.org.uk.

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