Best friend I'm in love with married a woman after we messed about in hotel pool

DEAR DEIDRE:  I HAD to watch helplessly as my best friend, the guy I’m in love with, got married.

I’m a guy of 31 and he is 33. I was staying at the hotel where the wedding took place. Just the day before we were playing around in the pool and he touched me in a “sensitive area”. He passed it off as a joke but I’m not sure.

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I’ve never had a girlfriend and think I’m into men, him specifically. We always did what some would call odd things, like feeding chocs into each other’s mouths.

We’ve kissed a few times and laughed afterwards. I thought he was into me too. 

He’s married now and living in Spain. I’m not sure if I should tell his wife and hope he comes back and continues to show these feelings with me or let him stay married. I feel empty and lonely without him.

DEIDRE SAYS: He might well be conflicted over his sexuality but you must back off and leave him to the life he has chosen. Pull yourself out of this fantasy because, now, that is all it is.

Focus not on what you lost but what you can gain. Find new activities and interests where you can form new relationships. My e-leaflet Gay Resources can help.

NEXT IN TODAY'S DEAR DEIDRE Since I got pregnant my fella has been calling me 'idiot' and 'airhead'

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